Mastering your Personality is the Key to Success

Success can’t be defined in numbers. It’s a feeling. You feel successful when you achieve your goals, but only when the goal is so big it first have to scare you, at least a little bit.

Maurice Zondag
5 min readJan 11, 2022


man with a suitcase walking through a gate towards the sunset
Photo by Mantas Hesthaven on Unsplash

We all want to experience success in our lives. But what do you define as success? That’s very personal and depends largely on your current state of being. If you’re 4 years old, wiping your own ass feels pretty successful. If you broke your ankle and you walk again without your crutches, that’s success too. But do we call it a success when any adult can spell their own name?

Success always is related to a goal. But that goal should be something you know you can’t reach without effort or have done before. Because reaching goals without effort is not a success, it’s just doing what you know how to do. Right?

This is how most people will measure success. Do something you’ve never done before and feel proud after you achieved it. You can be grateful for it that you’ve achieved your goal. Let’s put it like that.

So what makes you successful? Is it making $100k a year? Or $2,500 a month? Or have a loving relationship? Being able to have a 4 hour work week and spend the rest of your time on other dreams you have?

Only you can determine that.

Photo by Joel Muniz on Unsplash

This is where a lot of people already miss the essence because they see success as something that will impress others. A new car that is bigger than your neighbour’s car. A vacation you can show off on Instagram to all your followers you influence. Wearing branded high-end clothes to work to show off to your colleagues and then downgrading it. “This? Oh yes, it’s a handmade Armani suit, no big deal really.”

Or even getting that job to make your parents proud can feel as being successful, but for reasons that are not particularly helpful for your own feeling of success.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t do all that, I love Armani suits and love luxury as much as any other guy, just ask yourself why you want that so badly. Is it because of how others will see you in a certain way? Because in that case, your putting a lot of pressure in their hands to feel successful for yourself.

I call that the ‘victimized success’. Because you’re a victim, based on what others do or don’t do, think, or don’t think. And that always makes you a victim. Because it’s out of your hands and have no saying in the end result.

So why did I title this article that mastering your personality is the key to your success?

Let me explain.

You have thoughts, every day, right? A lot of them. And you feel a certain way with these thoughts too, right?

Right. Because they work together. Thoughts and feelings are like a brother and sister twin. They know exactly what’s going on in the other one.

Thoughts are the language of the brain and feelings are the language of the body. — dr. Joe Dispenza

I like that idea. So let’s stick with that. Your mind thinks thoughts and triggers your feelings that become emotions when you keep that loop closed long enough and keep repeating them.

A feeling last seconds. If you chose to repeat them they become an emotion and it’s your choice to do so or not.

And based on these emotions and thoughts you take your daily actions.

Depending on how you feel, you decide to work out or not, what to eat, what to read, or binge watch on Netflix. And all that leads to results. You don’t build muscle if you chose not to work out. Your body reacts to exactly the food you eat. It’s all connected: thoughts, feelings, and actions.

You could say then that the combination of your thoughts, feelings and actions, is what we call your personality. You are a smoker, you’re a runner, you’re overweight, you’re a procrastinator and so on. We have all these traits (combinations of Thoughts/Feelings/Actions) that we say we are. Our personality.

They all come from those golden three elements that we operate on every single day in our waking hours: thoughts, feelings and actions.

Back to success

We discovered that success is a goal you can’t achieve yet. You need to learn something new, you need to practice something, you need to take actions you’ve never taken before.

Because if you did took them before and you mastered the skill it wouldn’t be ‘success-label-worthy’, right?

Knowing this, we could then ask: how do you know which actions you need to take?

If you keep taking the same type of actions, nothing changes. So you need different actions. And, knowing what triggers actions, we therefore could say that you need different feelings and thoughts too, so you can come up with different actions than before.

In other words, you need to change your personality.

How? By becoming the master of the thoughts-feelings-actions process. You have to master your personality.

Because if you don’t, you keep being a victim of the situation. In how you’ve been programmed before. That personality isn’t capable of your targeted success. You have to become a master in making the change in your personality so you can become the success.

Mastering your personality is therefor the key to any success. It is how you learn what’s necessary to get to your goal.

So set your goal, master your personality and everything IS possible.

So what’s next?

Well first: know what you want. What is the goal that would make you feel successful? And is that a victimized success? Or is it what makes you proud of what You want?

Then, learn how to master your thoughts (also called mindset and beliefs), your feelings and emotions, and learn what actions you can take that align with all that. Don’t just take action, take the action that is aligned with your desired thoughts and feelings.

This is a difficult process. Because we’re so ingrained and indoctrinated in our current personality (you don’t know what you don’t know), that it is hard to know how you have to think, what the feeling is that connects with it, and even harder, what actions you should take and which you shouldn’t take. The wrong actions, feelings or thoughts will only do more damage than good for the bigger picture, of becoming successful as you’ve painted it for yourself.

And al that is exactly the process I can help you with. That’s why my company is called Master Your Personality. Because that’s the key to your success.

So let me help you with this.

Use this link to get a free strategy session to set clear what goals you have, and how you can make them happen with the methodology I just described.

Looking forward meeting your personality.



Maurice Zondag

I help men create their desired life as a certified Life Success Coach and LoA Coach. I love sharing ideas on how you can improve your life. Follow me for more